well hello peeps.

its been some time

o lvls technically is'nt over.
theres still science

but who's counting? haha.



God has been prodding me in the right direction again.

can't help but love a God like that. :)


well. with things going on as they are,

i've been battling with my pride alot. jelousy. insecurity. all that emotional drama that is my mess of a life. haha.
was'nt an issue back then. When all i knew was to trust in jesus. :)

but things changed since i've stopped living in God.


things that seemed so desirable without Him,
so tempting to just put God down and indulge in sin.
oh.. the sweetness in the mouth, but the bitterness inside..
amounts to nothing but pain and death.

lusts, pride. takes a giant of a man to even challenge these things.
but our victory is in God, who lived to die for our sins,
thats why i choose to live in Him :)


not that i've been living a double life,
but its been tough living up to my very own standards of a christian walk.
excuses? dont think so. trying to be as honest as i can.
the truth shall set you free, says the lord.

ah. the Christian standard.

is there even such a thing?
well. no.
God never expected us to be perfect,
it is because we are not that he sent His perfect son down for us.
yet, where did all these sanctions come from? Man, of course.
trust man to make it all so complicated eh.

child like faith.
what a blessing.

but back to my standards.
christians should work towards being disciples.
a disciplined God honoring life.
an example and testimony for all.
He is the church 24/7 with no compromise.
He is the man who moves mountains, but shines with no other glory than of God's.
but the core of him, the reason for everything he does, everything he gives to is one,
to touch the heart of God.

not beacuse he wants an identity as 'that crazy christian dude'
or even to get into heaven.
or after the experiences or miracles that God faithfully releases.
not because a popular girl likes men like that.(lol if only la broooo)
not even because your brothers are rising up, though it sounds okay.
and esepcially not cause others told him to do all those things.

Our faith should only and solely be based, cornerstoned, foundationed..(spastic words just trying to emphasize lol) on the one truth, that is Jesus.

all talk no action. jan 15. lol. its been ahwhile since then.

yeah.. what i'd wish for, is to have my relationship with christ back.

to spend endless nights chatting.( yes chatting with the creator)

to linger in true worship.

to lay it all down again. all for God.

to be engulfed in His love, the bliss you will never be able to find anywhere else.

to soar on his wings, being lifted so high yet being loved at the same time.



to end off..

read the past few posts.
seems like a temporary set back but.

God;s in control.
whom shall i fear?